Spain vs. the US: What I've learned

Before coming to Spain, I knew for sure I’d be gaining new life experiences. What I didn’t realize though was just how much I’d grow from spending five months in a foreign country. I thought that spending two years at college away from home had given me some sort of independence, but I had no idea just how much growing I had left to do. So, I thought as a final blog post I would make a list of things I have learned while studying abroad. Bear with me here, this one is going to be long.

1. Spanish

Perhaps this is the most obvious one, and something I definitely expected to learn from spending 5 months in a foreign country. Now I know from experience what everyone will ask me as soon as I come home. Are you fluent now? It’s absolutely everyone’s favorite question, and it’s a tricky one to answer. As soon as I say I don’t think so, people quickly jump to a condescending looks. But truth be told, I’m not sure it’s possible to become fluent in just 5 months. Maybe that is just my excuse, but there is just far too much vocab and colloquialisms to learn.  Now don’t start judging me yet. I know I spent a lot of time hanging out with Americans while I was here, and I’ll be the first to admit I didn’t speak as much Spanish as I possibly could have, but that in no way means I haven’t improved. When I first got here, I had a hard time understanding most things our family said, but now I often find myself listening to the radio, tv or even people’s conversations besides me and don’t realize until later that I understand what they are talking about. So I guess I don’t know how to say every word or phrase in Spanish, but thanks to 5 months in Spain, I now feel confident with my Spanish abilities. I can hold my own in a conversation. I’ve formed a close relationship with 3 kids and 2 Spanish parents whom I only speak with in Spanish. I’ve taken classes with all Spaniards as a foreign exchange student. I’m proud of myself for what I’ve accomplished. I know I have a lot more to learn, but I’ve got a whole lifetime ahead of me to keep practicing and improving.

2.How to live with a new family (with new rules)

For 5 months Colleen and I have been members of a Spanish family. I know a lot of people in our program would say they have just been a guest in their senora’s house, but we have had the blessing of having a family that has truly accepted us a member of their family. This wasn’t always easy…in fact most of the time I would say our family was far too comfortable with us. I've always been the youngest in the family, and I've had to learn how to live with younger siblings. I’m honestly not sure how my siblings ever did it. Far too often I found myself wanting to strangle Carmen at 8 in the morning when she screams (or during one of her many tantrums in the middle of the day). I had a few unfortunate run ins with naked 13 year old Luis. Maria lately has been coming home from school and stripping down to just her underwear. But I would take any of these slightly awkward instances any day because the way I see it, it is just their way of showing how comfortable they are around us. As I told Carmen when Maria wouldn't let her play with her friends at her communion, she has 2 other sisters to play with. I never thought that I’d have younger siblings (not to mention ones that only speak Spanish), but I’m so happy I was paired with them. And even though I've had my ups and downs with Pilar along the way, 90 percent of the time she has been great. Sure she could be a bit moody sometimes, but with Carmen as a child, who can blame her?  She eventually did remember my birthday 5 days later when Maria reminded her and felt so bad she had forgotten that she went out and got a cake right then and there. She will never be nearly as great as my real mom, but as a Spanish substitute for 5 months, I must admit she was pretty amazing.

3.Enjoy the moment

Throughout all of our trips and all of the bumps we hit along the way, Colleen and I always told each other one thing: It’ll all work out. Whether it was getting stuck in Florence without plane tickets home or train hoping through Germany to catch a flight in time, we always found a way to work things out. Traveling should be a fun experience, not a stressful one. I was lucky enough to have had a travel companion as great and as laid back as Colleen. All in all we visited 2 continents, 8 countries and 19 cities. Is there any better way to spend the semester?

4. How to travel

Before coming here I had only really taken vacations with my family. My parents did the planning, and I just sat back and enjoyed the ride. But after taking so many trips, I’ve learned quite a bit about how to travel. I now know the ins and outs of European trains, planes, hostels and sightseeing...and of course how to do it in the most fun and cheapest way. I’m not sure it’s a skill I can really explain. I guess just being thrown into new situations in new countries (that often speak a different language) has provided me with situations to learn from. I now feel confident in my ability to travel and more independent because of it.

Alright so now, to wrap up my blog posting career, I want to take a minute to reflect on the things I’m going to miss most in Spain and the things I can’t wait to get back to America for.  

First for what I’ll miss most about Sevilla,

1. The relaxed atmosphere. Not having much school work at all has been so completely different from the usual work load I have at UNC. I know going back to the Business school next semester will be a tough transition. But more than that the people here just have such a relaxed way of living. The 3 hour long siestas in the middle of the day and day drinking are exactly what Spain is all about….and I must admit I’ve gotten a little too used to it. 

2. This beautiful city in general. Sevilla truly is spectacular. I will miss walking by the river, finding my way through the tiny historic streets in el centro , gawking at the stunning cathedral and running through the beautiful Maria Luisa park. There truly is nowhere else quite like Sevilla.

3. My Spanish family. Yes, even Carmen. I didn’t realize how much I was going to miss them until this last week. Pilar and I both teared up this morning when Colleen left, and I’m 100% certain I’ll cry tomorrow night when I have to say goodbye. But as Pilar said herself, we will see each other again someday.

Us at dinner when Colleen's mom visited

 4. The cheap beer and wine. Drinking here is so common that drink prices have no choice but to be cheap. That being said, I guess I’ll also miss being legally able to drink. Thinking back on it, I don’t remember a time I was even carded while in Europe. Oh how different America will be.

 5. Cafes con leche…they are small, sure, but they are absolutely delicious. I’m afraid the Costco blend just might not hit the spot anymore.

 6. The ease of being able to travel. This semester has been full of amazing trips….trips that just aren’t possible from UNC. It really has been more like 5 months of vacation than anything else.

7. Pilar’s food. Having someone to cook for you twice a day is a luxury far greater than any dining hall plan back home. I will truly miss lunches with warm, freshly baked bread every day…although I’m sure my waistline won’t miss it

8. The new and amazing people I have met here. I have spent the past 5 months with Colleen. We sleep a foot away from each other, walk to class together, eat meals together and suffer through the highs and lows of our family together. In the past months, I don’t think we have spent more than 2 days apart. It will take some getting used to not spending every day with her….I hope that doesn’t sound too creepy. Although, reading it back through I don’t know how it couldn’t. I guess I should just say that in general I’m so happy to have had a great roommate and met wonderful new friends along the way. Colleen and I say all the time that we are on a 5 month long honeymoon. And I'm sad to say it seems that honeymoon has come to an end. But not to worry, we have PLENTY of pictures and memories to reminisce on back in Chapel Hill. I thought I'd leave you with just a few of our infamous honeymoon shots...believe me I had a lot to choice from.

Now, for the fun part: what I’m excited to go back to America for.

1.   Friends and family. I haven’t seen anyone from back home since January, except for my parents of course. I truly cannot wait to be reunited with Kevin at the airport on Wednesday, Daphne on Thursday and see my family at Anne’s wedding this coming weekend. Then there is the list long of UNC people I will hopefully see sometime this summer. If nothing else, at least being on the same time zone as everyone will be a relief.

Our family on Mother's Day. I'm looking a bit yellow on the iPad

2.Having more freedom and independence in my house. Living with your own parents is much more comfortable than constantly having to respect rules like no showering after 10 and always having slippers on. It has by no means been terrible, but it will be nice to get back to my own house, my own bed, my own parents and, most of all, a quite house without screaming (and far too often naked) children running around.

3.Gym—running through the parks here is truly wonderful, but I have missed having access to a gym. Not only for the sake of lifting weights, swimming or taking classes, but also so that I don’t have to listen to the whistles, honks, and comments from Spanish men.

4.Fully functioning internet. The connection here hasn’t been terrible, but often times the internet will go out without warning…especially when Skyping.

5.My closet. I know I’m getting a little materialistic here, but I really have missed having my full wardrobe. Coming here I had no choice but to pack light…plus I had to pack for winter and summer so having lots of outfits wasn’t really an option. I’m excited to get back to having choices…oh and to having my laundry done more than once every week and a half (a problem that wouldn’t be an issue in the US, but here gets a bit annoying with such a clothing restraint).

6.Libraries. Now this obviously isn’t something I’ll be taking advantage of right away, but come fall semester it is nice to know I can always go to the library if I need to get work done. The hours for libraries here are really inconvenient…not to mention the libraries are tiny and hard to find. 

7.Big cups of coffee. I know this goes against my café con leche love, but I do miss being able to sip on a big cup of coffee…far too often cafes con leche here are gone in a matter of minutes.

8.Air conditioning. As far as I know, our house does not have airconditioning, or at least if they do it certainly has not been turned on yet. In the middle of the day I find myself sweating if I stay in my room for too long…not to mention how terrible it has been to try and fall asleep at night when I’m hot. I’m sure I’ll sleep like a baby come Wednesday night. I can almost feel the air coming from the vents just thinking about it.

9.Cell phone. My prepaid cell phone here has certainly served its purpose. I’ve been able to contact friends if I’m out and call Pilar if I need to tell her something, but with every phone call or text, I think about how much money I have left on my phone. I also really miss just being able to call my mom, sister or aunt when I’m walking around just to chat. Unlimited texting and free calls to Verizon customers is going to feel like a luxury when I go back.

10.Food. Alright I know I’m really sounding like a hypocrite now because I just said how much I am going to miss some of Pilar’s food, but I have been craving certain foods ever since I got here. I’ll try not to go on for too long (something that is very easy to do with this subject), but to name a few: Chickfila, Mexican food, any type of cheese (Pilar doesn’t like cheese so therefore we never eat it), fruits (we’ve been deprived for the past 2 weeks for some reason), vegetables (far too often the only thing resembling a vegetable that I see all day are french fries), sushi, pizza, my mom’s oatmeal (and any breakfast food that isn’t corn flakes for that matter), macaroni and cheese, and Chinese….just to name a few.

I know I made the US list longer than the Spain one, but I guess that is probably just because of how much I’ve been thinking about all the things I’ll be going home to. I will miss this place, but I know I’ll come back one day. There is no use being sad at this point...I am just happy that I was given this opportunity. And thank you for reading this. I hope you have enjoyed it as much as I have enjoyed writing down all my thoughts. I hope to one day read through my old posts and relive some of my experiences. But for now I must concentrate on getting to Madrid tomorrow and then back home on Wednesday. So for now, hasta luego espana!

Final Week

I still don’t know if it has really hit me yet that I only have a handful of days left in Spain. My emotions are highly mixed about returning home. I’m excited to get back to my friends and family of course, but at the same time I’m sad to have to close this chapter of my life…and a big part of me knows that after a week back home working with children in the Georgia heat I’m really going to wish I was back in Spain. I’ll try not to bore you for too long…as I plan to dedicate a separate blog post to Spain versus the US tomorrow or Tuesday.

This past week has been a great one. Pilar has been in the best of moods and I’ve finally finished up all my finals. With the strike that the university decided to go on, the last two weeks of class ended up being canceled.  This ended up making one of my university exams that was supposed to be on May 23^rd a take home exam…easily the best present I could have asked for. I spent a good while last weekend studying for my history of movies final. I took that on Monday and left feeling like I had been cheated. The professor only asked us to write 2 essays, 1 about a general topic and 1 about a specific movie we had watched in class. Throughout the semester we had watched 3 full movies and so I had studied the directors, actors, key scenes, etc for each of those 3 movies. Then I get to the test and he instead has us write about a 10 minute movie clip we had watched back in February.  Then the other question just asked about Westerns (a topic we had only spent 20 minutes discussing during one class). At UNC for a final you are expected to know everything. Here its more luck of the draw with what question you will get asked. I guess I ended up studying Russian, German, Italian, and Japanese cinema for nothing. Luckily, I only need a 5 out of 10 in the class to pass so hopefully I will squeeze by.

On Wednesday I decided to put off doing my final paper for Historia del Cine and go to Cadiz for the day with Colleen and Jess. We spent the day soaking up the sun on the beach and even met up with 3 other UNC summer students while we were there. Spanish beaches are about 50/50 with topless women…a concept I couldn’t quite understand completely. Why do some women walk around topless while others (who look and sound equally as Spanish) are fully covered? It’s a mystery I guess, but it sure made for some interesting and at times very uncomfortable people watching.

On the beach

View from the point

The city of Cadiz

Thursday was unfortunately a library day for me (although Spanish libraries are far less convenient than UNC’s 24 hour UL or Davis). I finally had to suck it up and write my movie analysis of the Wizard of Oz that I’d been putting off since February. If you had told me five months ago that I’d be able to write a 22 page paper in Spanish in one day, I don’t think I would have believed you. But by some miracle I was able to finish up the entire thing and hand it in on Friday morning. I guess my Spanish has gotten better after all.

Thursday was also Carmen’s 5^th birthday…a day she had been reminding us about for as long as I can remember. She also kept dropping comments about how we had to buy her a birthday present…and she even went so far as to write it on the family calendar to remind us. Calling her a brat would not even begin to describe her. But Colleen and I, being the nice people that we are, bit our tongues and went to Corte Ingles (a department store here that has everything you could ever want…and a barbershop and dry cleaners too) to find her a present. We eventually decided on a pretty cute green stuffed animal frog for her (mostly because the price was right). After dinner that night, her godmother came over and gave her a cute tutu, shirt and new sandals. Carmen of course ripped through the bags, looked at the presents, and then had a face that seemed to be asking: is there more? But without so much as a thank you, she went into her room to put her presents away. Colleen and I told her we had a present for her too. She quickly skipped into our room, and Colleen handed her the bag. She pulled out the stuffed animal, did not so much as smile, and then ran into her room to put it away. Maria rolled her eyes and apologized for her. And wouldn’t you know it Carmen then came running back in the room and asked me where my present was for her. I told her the stuffed animal was from both of us, and she turned right back around and left. I can only hope that one day she’ll wise up and outgrow her brat phase, but at this point it isn’t looking promising.

The slight smile you see on her face lasted long enough for me to snap this picture

A funny side story about Carmen: last Sunday Colleen woke up around 11 and went to the kitchen to get some breakfast. Pilar was still asleep in bed, and papa Luis was sleeping on the couch in just his boxers with a gallon of water next to him (needless to say, they had gone out drinking with friends the night before). She then walks into the kitchen to find Maria eating cookies dipped in fruit milk for breakfast, and Carmen eating raw spaghetti noodles. I guess that just goes to show that even after being here 5 months, you never know what to except with this family. 

Now for perhaps the most interesting part of my week: Maria’s first communion. Even on the very first day we got here, Maria asked us if we were going to be here June 2^nd. But although Colleen and I knew what a highly anticipated event this was, we still had absolutely no idea what to expect. So crossing our fingers that we had interpreted the Spanish dress code correctly, we walked over to catch the bus to Marchena with our family. (Papa Luis’s parents live in Marchena, about 30 minutes outside of Sevilla, and they own the egg factory where he works…which is where the communion after party was held). On the bus we met a ton of relatives…including the highly anticipated meeting of Pilar’s sister, husband, and their 2 year old, redheaded son who knows 4 languages. When we arrived in Marchena, we all walked to the church together. The ceremony lasted about an hour, and the priest randomly would sing different parts of the prayers and homoly. Colleen and I were both a bit confused as to what was going on, but we managed to follow along pretty well. I did take communion, even though I’m not catholic…but no one questioned it so I think I slid by. 

Maria with Pilar and Luis at the church

Us with the girl of the day!

After the ceremony was over, we were expecting to head to the factory for the after party where Pilar had said there would be a pool, tennis courts, and a tent with food. For some reason though, we killed an hour bar hopping before getting back on the bus to go to the factory. Colleen and I weren’t sure if we were going to be allowed to drink, so we just stuck with diet coke at the bars. After the adults had worked up a buzz, we got back on the bus and eventually arrived at the factory. Pilar did a great job setting everything up. There was a tennis court and soccer field for the kids to play on (they weren’t allowed to swim for safety reasons), and an open bar for all the adults to take advantage of us. As soon as we walked in, Colleen and I headed straight for the snacks. We hadn’t been giving any breakfast that morning and were starving by the time 2 came around. We still weren’t exactly sure whether we would be allowed to drink. Pilar and Luis drink Cruzcampo beers like water in our house, but they have only ever served us when our parents came to visit. It was a fine line to walk, so we decided to wait and see if they would offer us anything first. As luck would have it, party-man Papa Luis came over and told us to take advantage of the open bar and have whatever we want…and listed cerveza in a list of options. He didn’t have to tell us twice, and as soon as we finished talking to him, we headed straight for the bar. The 6 hours we spent at the party went by very fast. Food just kept coming out and the bartenders just kept pouring. We were given everything we could have possibly imagined to eat: chips, bread, tortilla de patata, caracoles (snails), gazpacho, ham, cheese, sandwiches, paella, candy, and 7 different kinds of cakes. Needless to say we made it into our breakfast, lunch and dinner for the day. And even after the food had stopped and we decided we were still a little hungry around 7:30, papa Luis got us some sandwiches…he was easily my favorite person that day.

Enjoying the caracoles (tiny little snails)

Colleen and I with Princess Carmen

Pilar's brother preparing the paella

Juan (the redheaded Spanish 2 year old who knows 4 languages)

Papa Luis showing off his flamenco skills (he was actually really good!)

Carmen on the tennis courts (I think I like her better behind bars)

Maria was a bit of a diva all night while Carmen oddly enough acted like a perfect angel. Colleen and I were convinced some sort of Freaky Friday moment was going on. Pilar was also very friendly with us as were every guest at the party. Different aunts, uncles and cousins came up to us throughout the night asking, “Are you THE Americans?” It was very funny, but we got to practice a lot of our Spanish with them. A good amount of people there had also studied abroad in Ireland with Pilar and Luis and were eager to practice their English with us. Pilar’s brother was great at English and was super friendly to us. He apparently is the one who taught Luis had to make paella. Being from Valencia, he is quite the expert on making some pretty delicious paella. He also made sure we had drinks in our hands throughout the night. Spaniards certainly know a thing or two about parties! There was a rather creepy family friend who asked us a bunch of deep questions in Spanish like would you rather be happy or please other people? Or, do you want children? He had 3 kids that were all at the party, but that didn’t stop him from taking a picture of us, calling us beautiful, and then holding up 2 lemons to Colleen’s chest. Needless to say, we did our best to steer clear of him. But all in all the party was a huge success and we found ourselves not wanting to get back on the bus to go home. 

Us "helping" with the paella

Today has been a sad day. Colleen and I woke up early to go check out some street markets. Along the way we crossed off the final thing left on our Sevilla bucket list: eat churros with chocolate. They weren’t anything fantastic, but they are extremely popular here so we thought it’d be a shame not to have them at least once in 5 months. Colleen goes home tomorrow, and our room is already looking sad. Pilar came in to tell us our lunch was in the oven (they are all eating out with relatives), and realized Colleen had packed up. She said we shouldn’t be too sad because it’s not goodbye, it’s until later. We gave her a framed picture of us with the whole family from when Colleen’s mom visited, and she started to tear up. Maria then came in and remembered how soon we’re leaving and her face just dropped. It must be so hard for this family to get close to girls every semeseter and to continually have to say goodbye after a few short months. I’m so grateful that a family as great as this one opened their doors to us. They have truly made my time in Spain the best expereinece I could have hoped for. They were supposed to take in girls for the summer, but Pilar is mad at our program director who shorted her money for this month since both Colleen and I are leaving before our program officially ends. I completely agree with her though. Our parents have already paid for us to be here and it isn’t fair for the program to pocket the money that was supposed to go to them if we had stayed. I can only hope that they will work things out though. This family is truly too great for UNC to lose as a host.

Churros and chocolate (they look a bit like organs, but they were pretty tasty)

Tomorrow morning Colleen leaves to go back home, and on Tuesday night I head to Madrid to spend the night before my morning flight home on Wednesday. I don’t think it will completely hit me that I’m leaving until I get on the plane…or maybe once Colleen leaves tomorrow. I promise to write one more blog post soon though, and after that I’ll be back in the states!

A random picture I don't think I ever got around to posting. It's from a rooftop hotel bar with a pretty spectacular view of the cathedral. I sure am going to miss this beautiful city!